"Don’t be aggressive with your Friends and Family"!!!

The following article is an excerpt from “The 100 simple secrets of Happy People” by David Niven Ph.D. The entry contains a key research finding, complemented by advice and an example that follow from the finding. Its a wonderful read.
0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

Even if you are right, there is nothing to be gained from letting yourself become adversarial with your loved ones. Remember how much more important these people are to you than is the issue you are talking about.

It would be great to always be right, wouldn’t it?

Adam is always right. At least, he thinks so. Whether it’s a matter of a trivia question or the best way to hang wallpaper, Adam knows the answer. When his family challenges him on some point, any point, Adam launches an inquest. He asks people to tell him why they disagree, and then he tries to catch them in an inconsistency. His follow-up questions are like those used by a lawyer trying to get an unreliable witness to admit his faults.

Adam always wins. He almost always gets a concession from the witness. The problem is, Adam’s witness is not a criminal in a courtroom but a friend or loved one who holds a different opinion. Some of his friends have concluded it’s just not worth disagreeing with Adam, and others have concluded it’s not even worth talking to Adam, since you never know when a topic will lead to a controversy. Adam wins all the little battles, but he loses the metaphorical war. He loses the opportunity to spend enjoyable time with those he cares about.

Prevalent criticism within relationships reduces happiness up to one-third. – O’Conner 1995.

In an Argument, it is better to lose the argument than to lose a loved one...